Missing/Wanted

My best friend Rae and I haven't talked or seen each other in awhile. She's been in the middle of moving, and I've been in the middle of a horrific couple of weeks at work. I received an e-mail from her yesterday, and here's how it goes:

- - -

Missing: Best Friend

Description: Goes by the name of Luv, Luvvy, or Luvs. Early 20's, dyed hair, brown eyes, pearly smile, professional-type clothing.

Last seen: January 20, 2006

Last heard from: Febraury 3, 2006

Recent failure to contact moving best friend has generaged concern re: where-abouts and well-being of said friend.

If you see this girl, please have her call 604-123-4567.


Wanted: New Best Friend

Must be quirky and energetic, have a great sense of humour, and hate animals. Willingness to infringe on new-found freedom of frist-time home-renter, overstays welcome and rack up outrageous phone bills an asset. Listening and caring skills essential.

Alcoholics, drug users and white girls need not apply unless financially established.

Please contact 604-123-4567 for more information.

- - -

Hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Isn't she great?!

I'll be calling her tonight...before she decides to replace me!