Monday, September 11, 2006

L'Oncle

As many of you already know, my family is crazy. Since the apple doesn't fall far from the tree...well then, you know what that says about me. Anyway, I mostly blog about my idiot brother and his craziness. Today I will blog about one of my uncles. Uncle D is my dad's oldest brother (my dad is the youngest in a family of six kids) and Uncle D is number 3. He is by far my funniest/craziest uncle. Here are a couple of his stories.

- - -

We were all at a wedding reception one day and I went over to say hello to my uncle. He was wearing a suit and tie and looked quite spiffy but I noticed that he was wearing runners with his outfit.

"Hi Uncle D!"

"Hello Sona."

"Um. Why are you wearing runners?"

He put on his serious face.

"Well dear, you never know when you might need to make a run for it."

My jaw dropped. Satisfied with my reaction, my uncle turned around and walked away. Later on that evening, I caught up to him again.

"Uncle D, who would you be running from?"

He thinks for a moment, nods his head and looks over at me.

"The wife comes to mind."

My jaw drops. He walks away. Again.

- - -

On another day, I decided to ask my uncle about his grey hair. His hair is quite unique in that the hair on one side of his head is black and the other side is grey and it literally splits down the middle. I've always wondered why he didn't dye his hair.

"Hey Uncle D, why don't you just dye your hair one colour?"

"Well dear, you have to understand my dilemma."

"And what is your dilemma?"

"You see, my wife wants me to look young and my kids want me to look old."

"...O...k..."

"So, when I'm talking to my wife I turn this way." He turns to the side on which only his black hair shows.

"When I'm talking to my kids I turn this way." He turns to his grey hair side.

"And that dear keeps everyone happy."

I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe. Satisfied with my reaction, he turned around and walked away.

2 Comments:

Blogger Dr. Coopernicus Who said...

this guy seems to have the shortest conversations in the world. i need to master the art of getting out of small talk with witty phrases like him!

4:18 p.m.  
Blogger Elle said...

you need to perfect the "shock factor". if your audience is shocked enough or laughing too hard and they can't say anthing...you then have an opportunity to walk away. that's what he does to me all the time.

11:56 p.m.  

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